Mother's Day - Survival Guide

It's almost here again...

Mother's day is one of the hardest days on the calendar when you're trying to conceive.

Really.
It's a hard week.
A painful reminder as marketing ramps up.
I totally get it.
The fertility marathon feels even longer right now.

If you're trying naturally or in the IVF trenches mothers day is a repetitive kick to the guts.

The loss and grief culminates into something bigger.
And even more painful.
I understand how much you were hoping this would be the year that you get to be celebrated.

Today I want to share some ways you survive this Sunday.

Say no and drop the guilt.

If you feel obligated to attend a brunch or lunch...
this is your sign to say no.

Create strong boundaries for the day and stick to them.
You don't need to feel any guilt.
Honouring yourself and your needs is priority number 1.

Go offline.

One of the most helpful tools for surviving mother's day is turning off all notifications on socials.

Better yet, log out of your accounts.

If it feels right for you.
Tell your friends and loved ones you are taking a personal day.
Don't feel bad if you want to tell them not to call or text.

Because honestly,

If you need to spend the day under the covers binge watching sex and the city.
You should absolutely be able to do that without any distraction.
Take a break from your supplements and rules today.

Drink the wine. Eat the chocolate.

Have a plan for the day....or don't? 

Confusing much?

What I'm trying to say is lean in to who you are.
If you are like me (Type A!!),
then making a plan for what you are going to do for the day will feel good.
For me that would look like baking

Comfort food, re-watching Greys Anatomy and drinking multiple gins.

For you though...
it might feel better to not plan at all.
Go with the flow and take the day as it comes.

Whatever camp you are in though,
do things that make you feel good.
Whatever that looks like.
You deserve it.

There's a lot of people online

Giving advice on how to survive the day.

A lot of encouragement to focus on what you have achieved.
And all the good you are doing on your fertility journey.

You know, focus on the positives..

But honestly?
Let's be real.
It feels so condescending.

Because there are so many people who don't have to do this

And still get to join the mother's club.
Its really not fair.
So I'm here to be your cheerleader to say 'fuck it.'

I know you are doing so much amazing work for your fertility.

One day of eating and drinking what you want won't damage your chances.
If you are still trying for your first baby, or struggling with your second or third...
the strength and courage that you face EVERYDAY is something I admire.
And I will be celebrating you this weekend.

Because you are already the most incredible mother.

Who is going over and beyond for this baby that is yet to come.
If today is hard for you,
please know my heart is with you.
And you are not alone.

Even though it may feel like it is.

Jaya xx